My Own Little World
by anonymoustonight
Summary: Bella gets shipped off to Forks by her mom. There she meats the Collens. But what if Bella would rather live in her own world then Reality? Will Edward save her before its to late? R&R pleeeaasseeee
1. Chapter 1

I lay on my bed curled into a ball as the flames licked off the walls. They danced around making beautiful patterns.

Renee, my mother, was in the other room talking to my father Charlie on the phone. She was shipping me off to Forks, Washington to live with him under the pretense that her and her new husband Dip were going to move around a lot for his baseball and didn't want me home alone.

**Lies**

She couldn't handle me. Renee and I never got along that well. She was loud, outgoing, and always wanted to try something new and I would rather stay home and lock myself away from the world.

She had resented me as soon as she had noticed that I was different. She couldn't rap her head around it and she certainly couldn't handle it. Going with Dip was just the final push to get read of me.

I didn't hate Dip though. He was good for Renee; he was the adult she needed. And it's not like he hated me.

**Lies**

When Renee and Dip first started dating he would buy me things to make me like him. He soon found out it didn't matter though. Renee didn't care about my option if him and to tell you the truth I didn't care enough to have an option.

I guess I should have been happy when they started dating. When Renee wasn't dating was the bad times. We would never have food in the house and there was never water because she would forget to pay the bills. I didn't notice most of the time. I didn't want to notice.

His name isn't really Dip. It was Gill or Phil or something. I just call all of Renee's boyfriends Dip. I have always been bad at remembering names and she just went through boys so fast. The reason I chose Dip was because it was short for Dip shit. All of them were stupid and thought that they had some sort of power over me.

I mostly called thought of them as dip shits because they thought that they would last longer than a week with Renee. I was surprised that Renee had stayed so long with her new hubby now, 3 months and counting. I was just happy that I have been able to take a shower every day, looks like someone has been paying the bills.

You think that after they got married that I would stop calling him Dip but to tell you the truth I can't even remember his name.

The flames moved closer… so close…

**Lies**

Something wet slipped down my cheek.

None of this mattered. Renee would still be shipping me off in the morning to live with some father I blearily know in a town named after an eating utensil.

And the flames drew closer, so close I could almost smell them. So close I could almost feel the heat on my face and I could almost feel them rap me in a worm embrace.

But they didn't.

They weren't there.

Because they were only and allusion.

And then the flames engulfed me.


	2. First day in utensel town

I don't own Twilight… though I like every other person out there I would shoot the guy next to me for a chance to own it!

Ok so some of you may be wondering 'what was with the flames in the last chap'… In my story Bella has a mental Illness called Schizophrenia. First of all I would like to say that I don't have/ know anyone that has it so some of the things that I say may not be accurate. I did look it up though and read the symptoms and what it does so hopefully everything will be accouter. I would like to apologize to the people before hand if something I say offends them. I really don't want to offend anyone I just thought it would be an interesting thing to write.

* * *

Bella's Pov

I don't know when I first started to get the hallucination. I have had them for as long as I could remember them. When I was little I didn't understand that other people didn't see what I saw. I would tell people and they would call me a liar. The other kids thought I was weird and didn't want to make friends with me.

When I realized that none saw them but me I distanced myself from people even more. Sometimes it's hard to tell what is real and fake. I couldn't even tell in my younger years.

When I was twelve I used to think about maybe telling someone I saw and heard things. Maybe go to a shrink. But I couldn't imagine someone finding out! What if they thought I was crazy? What if they locked me up? Or even worse! What if they took it away?

I don't think I would be able to handle not having the hallucinations. They were the only things that got me though life

**Face it**

Sometimes fantasy was better than real life.

"Bella we're here."

Renee snapped me out of my thoughts.

I didn't even look at her as I went to the back to get my suitcase. I only had one. There wasn't much for me to bring just some clothes and a notebook or two, speaking of which I had one in my hands right now. I looked down at it. The page that it was opened to had an unfinished drawing of the Arizona landscape.

It was the only thing I could bring with me that would remind me how beautiful Arizona is. The only thing that could remind me how beautiful reality could be.

"Bella are you listening to me?"

My head snapped up to Renee. She had Tears running down her face. It seemed like she was in the middle of her last good bye speech.

**Face it**

Those were most likely face tears, or tears of joy. She was happy to get me out of her hair.

_None cares about me_

**I care**

"Bella!"

"Oh sorry." I looked at the air port coming up with an excuse to leave. "I should get going my plain will be here soon."

"Ok honey. Have a safe trip."

I nodded before walking away.

* * *

I sat on a bench waiting for Charlie. I had had a window seat on the way to Forks. The whole time I had stared out of it wishing to see even one glimpse of and angle.

**Face it**

I wouldn't see and angle. I couldn't control what I see.

"Bella is that you?"

I turned around. There was Charlie. He still looked the same as I had remembered him. I can't remember the last time I saw him though. Was it last year? Or was it the year before that?

I turned to him a smiled. I wasn't real but he didn't need to know that.

"Bella you grew so much I can barely recognize you! I'm glad you decided to spend some time with your old man."

Figures. Renee didn't have the guts to tell Charlie that she sent me hear. Instead she made some half ass lie about me wanting to come.

_None cares about me._

**I care**

_But who are you?_

"It's nice to see you Charlie." I said with a small sad smile. I saw his falter at what I called him. But come on he didn't expect me to use the word _dad _or worse _daddy_, at least I had the right name. Right?

Now that would be bad.

"Well Bells let's get this to the car."

I nodded.

The car ride was silent. I wasn't a big talker and apparently so wasn't Charlie.

I stared out the window. We were driving through a forest and there were trees everywhere. But they weren't trees. As we drove past them they turned to liquid. They tried to keep up with use as we pasted but we were too fast. The browns and greens merged together in my window.

"I bought you a car."

Charlie shocked me out of the silence. Wait what did he just say?

"You what?" My voice didn't even sound surprised to me, just flat. This was the way I always talked though. A leveled monotone voice.

"I bought you a car. I got it off one of my friends down in La Push. He and I go fishing together his name is Billy, do you remember him?"

I shook my head no.

"Oh well It doesn't matter you were young. Anyway its and old thing but it runs fine. And Billy's son Jacob will fix it if it breaks."

I wondered if I should be happy for Charlie. That was the most I've hurd him say at once ever.

When we got to the house there were two people in the driveway. One was in a wheel chare and the other looked about my age. I was always bad at ages though so around my age could probable mean from fifteen to nineteen. Yah I know it's sad.

Charlie and I stepped out of the car.

"Hello Charlie! I got the fried chicken and the trucks right over there," Said the one in the wheel chair. He then turned to me. "You must be the famous Isabella that we have hurd so much about. You probably don't remember me but I'm Billy and that's my sun Jacob. You and he used to play when you were kids."

I vaguely remembered something about the boy. I had told him about one of my hallucinations and he had laughed at me.

That didn't matter though. Instead of shaking ether of their hands I turned to the truck in the driveway.

"Is that mine?" I asked.

Jake, Blake,… Danny?... Seemed to ketch up with my question first because he started to ramble on enthusiastically about the car.

I turned away from Car Boy; damn that nick name is sooo boring I may even forget it! Then have to make a whole new one up!

Any way Car Boy, … or is Family Friend better…, was still rambling when I faced Charlie.

"I'm going inside now."

* * *

When I found my room, it wasn't that hard it's a two bedroom house, I set my things down. It still looked the same as the last time I saw it, one, two years ago?

I put my things away before lying down in bed. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad?

**Face it**

This wasn't going to be any different than in Phoenix. A change in scenery wouldn't help. And to make it worse I was an outsider. Forks was a town that everyone new everyone, Hell everyone's grate grate grandparents know each other!

I hurd the soft pitter patter if rain on my window and as I hurd it I could almost hear the soft beats of wings agents it.

**Almost**

Do you like it? please R&R

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